Things Gone and Things Still Here (jette) wrote,
Things Gone and Things Still Here
jette

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Star-crossed Lovers

Something a friend wrote about the bedroom habits of his star sign made me want to write of my experiences around the heavens. (Just for fun, please do not take me too seriously. For what I REALLY think about astrology, go here.)

Aries
My father and my youngest son are both Aries. Needless to say I have never, ever had an Aries boyfriend. Aries have a certain deep romantic streak and need for affection underneath those control issues. I've only knowingly kissed one once, but that was the softest, most delicate, most subtle kiss I'd ever had. Like placing my tongue in a cloud. *sigh*

Taurus
They like to drink and screw. I'm okay with that.

Gemini
They sure do like to make out a lot, and it seems like I've always had at least one, usually many, in my inner circle at every point in my life, but I don't think I've ever had anything like a real date with one. There is probably a reason for this! I don't know how to explain, the but the Virgo-Gemini connection seems almost incestuous.


Cancer
Waaaay too moody. My Venus is in Cancer, so I think if I ever hooked up with one we'd just cry all over each other.

Leo
They look good and they're good at what they do, and they know it, and that's about it.

Virgo
According to this book Steve has on sexual astrology, when two Virgos get together, they like to beat each other with sticks and then take a bath. Or maybe that's when two Finns get together. Anyway, Virgo on Virgo loving just doesn't seem to have enough loving in it.

Libra
Libra men are the most wonderful, kind, sensuous, passionate, loving, spiritual, caring, protective, warm and sexy people on earth. Unless you need them to make a decision anytime soon. Other than that, they rock my world and everything in it. However, Libra females are, without exception, batshit insane.

Scorpio
*rawr* Scorpios of both sexes make me quiver. They are warm, sexy, and loyal and can keep a secret, but on the flipside they can also have that sting.

Sagittarius
They're soooo much fun until they go on to the next thing! They always do better with someone less inclined to be fretful than me and I always have a hard time letting them go.

Capricorn
They're smart, they're attractive, they kiss nice, they always seem to have a lot going on for themselves, and all the ones I have known have been just... too worked up all the time. Load your tranq gun before dating one.

Aquarius
Does this sign even exist? I don't think I've ever even met an Aquarius, much less dated one.

Pisces
I have had a couple of Pisces boyfriends. Something about these sexy but exasperating little fish just make me want to find whatever boundaries or limits they have and start pushing till they break, just to find something solid about them! Their females are much stronger, kind of the inverse of the Libra situation.
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